Opening Your Heart to Receive
How can you become what you already are?
Recently I saw a Bashar video that reminded me of a very important truth - We are already the complete version of our manifestation. We simply restrict the energy flow from fear and insecurity.
When you think of manifestation from this place, it becomes more of an unfolding or unfurling rather than a seeking. This profound perspective shift allows you to go within and see the patterns that developed in your psyche from ancestral obligation and social programming.
What layers of resistance have you put around yourself to protect yourself from being in your most embodied state?
In the last few months I’ve really started manifesting the reality where I don’t have to work for a corporation to pay my bills. This is a seriously deep program with me, and even though I am clearly, fully capable of providing for myself with other means, I have not been financially successful to do so. It’s such a profound and silly disconnect, but the block is so firm. I have easily gotten money from jobs and through any other venture it has only trickled in tiny, unsustainable amounts. I have often given up easily because of this and continued investing myself in corporate work. It is an emotional block for me and it has been extremely heavy to untangle.
Wrapped up in family programming and expectation, the idea that I could trust myself enough to create my own abundance was belittled and mocked as I became an adult. I developed a deep distrust of society and worldly ventures - and as such, I started to deeply distrust myself within them. I felt like I had to play a role to get paid, and so I became a robot in my mind and worked corporate jobs as one. This is the layer I put around myself to prevent my authentic and abundant timeline.
I believed in my ability to make money as a robot so deeply, that I have had a very lucrative and prestigious career in tech, despite the fact that I wasn’t able to be my authentic self, and that a very, very small fraction of my skills and knowledge were being put to use.
As I shift out of this mindset I look back, asking myself -
Why did I take such a limiting path?
Why did I create money from such an inauthentic place?
Why did I push myself in situations that weren’t really meant for me?
The answer that seems to be at the root of all these things is that I didn’t trust myself. I didn’t trust my authentic self to be valued enough in this society to generate money. I didn’t trust myself to know how to create value from the authentic place. And lastly, I felt that receiving money for my authentic energy was disingenuous.
For many spiritual people money can feel like a corrupt energy in and of itself. Unless you’ve done the mindset work, when most people think of money they feel lack - but of course lack is NOT abundance.
If you feel the energy of lack when you think of money, you get all wrapped up in a weird spiral where you’re trying to associate a feeling of lack to the idea of abundance. From that mixed-up emotional place it’s impossible to manifest abundance with money.
That’s why the mindset work is so important. When you learn what true abundance is (a regulated nervous system, having what you need in each moment) and you realize the 3D holds less power than you once thought, you can then shift to the idea and feeling that money is not abundance exactly, but an extension of abundance. Money is a toy to play with in this realm. True abundance is so much larger than money, and money is just a little aspect of the grander reality of richness that life provides.
As I try to climb out of the terrifying hole I put myself in, where I am only safe if I’m a robot and money can only come from inauthenticity within a corporate structure, I feel the layers peeling off like an onion. These protective shields I put around myself to adapt to society, to adapt to my family, to embrace what I thought was right and good.
I peel layers and layers away, feeling vulnerable and raw. It comes in waves where I don’t feel confident in myself and my ability to break this pattern. It’s so deep that I find myself accepting job interviews for jobs I don’t want. Making my resume better even though I refuse to send it out. Channeling uncertainty into an old, outdated mindset.
I hold space for myself and acknowledge that this is a tough one for me. Financial stability isn’t just safety in this society - it’s survival. Sometimes I feel like a trapped animal looking for a way out, unable to trust the higher forces at play, unable to trust the journey. I feel lost, like I’m in the bottom of a pit, dirty and cold, and if only I followed my old patterns… I fantasize. But I know there is no going back. I continue building my energetic ladder and putting my faith into myself. Forgiving myself for the fantasy of the old way, and knowing that what is to come is going to be better than I ever could have imagined.
I will continue channeling my energy into my life coaching and my new spiritual technology company. Because even though they’re tiny seeds, I know they will grow into an entire garden of abundance - if only I allow them to.
